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Author Topic: European English:  (Read 3830 times)
Fiatdude
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« on: December 30, 2011, 06:16:19 am »
European English:

The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was the other possibility.
As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5- year phase-in plan that would become known as 'Euro-English'.
In the first year, 's' will replace the soft 'c'. Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with joy. The hard 'c' will be dropped in favour of 'k'. This should klear up konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter. There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the troublesome 'ph' will be replaced with 'f'. This will make words like fotograf 20% shorter.
In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to reach the stage where! more komplikated changes are possible.
Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling.
Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent 'e' in the languag is disgrasful and it should go away.
By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing 'th' with 'z' and 'w' with 'v'.
During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary 'o' kan be dropd from vordskontaining 'ou' and after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.
Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru
Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze forst plas.
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pacoima914
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« Reply #1 on: December 30, 2011, 10:33:07 am »
OMG, WTF, LOL!!!
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Svwerker
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« Reply #2 on: December 30, 2011, 12:14:12 pm »
*LOL*

Made my day!
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LuftsickTero
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WWW
« Reply #3 on: December 30, 2011, 15:01:21 pm »
old commercial:

<a href="http://www.youtube.com/v/gh5xu35bAxA" target="_blank">http://www.youtube.com/v/gh5xu35bAxA</a>
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Nico86
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Turnip engine.
« Reply #4 on: January 04, 2012, 15:18:06 pm »
Haha Smiley
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The Threads Thread : http://cal-look.no/lounge/index.php/topic,14644.0.html
carlito421
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« Reply #5 on: January 04, 2012, 22:46:36 pm »
fun
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Russell
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« Reply #6 on: January 05, 2012, 15:48:25 pm »
Your lucky it wasn't Scottish-English

Aye aye bonnie loons and fit like ?
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Best Regards

Russell
Catbox
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« Reply #7 on: January 07, 2012, 17:54:18 pm »
Zat iz zom funy stuf right zer.
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Neil Davies
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« Reply #8 on: January 10, 2012, 17:04:12 pm »
Quote from: VW Gasser Garage on January 05, 2012, 15:48:25 pm
Your lucky it wasn't Scottish-English

Aye aye bonnie loons and fit like ?

My mum is from Glasgow, as was the Dad of a friend at my primary school - we were the only two in our class who understood Rab C Nesbitt... Not the humour, just the language! Cheesy

Do you remember hearing about Trainspotting being subtitled for it's American release? Shocked
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